Kegs on Legs

punters,

while the dingo try’s to dry out from booze fest weekend let’s take a moment to talk about a very extinct but magnificant species….

the dingo is talking about the Kegs on the Legs…..

Now these dinosaurs use to be the fabric of our once great cricketing nation…..

The boonies, the boofs, the warnies , rodney marsh’s Cricketing Artists

And when we all thought they were a dieing bred, up pops the rotund Daniel Smith!

Putting on a bombing display not seen since Pearl Harbour!

Old Smithy sent them packing to all parts of North Sydney Oval….

The Dingo is then informed this man is not on a contract…Now surely NSW Cricket could get into contact with Darby’s pies and get some some bonus system in place!

Blind Freddie can see this Fat Prick can play!

We need these blokes striking back from the influx of sticker wearing, peroxiding, hair streaking, metrosexuals….

To all the fat little bastards out there that whack the cricket ball with the best of them, your country needs you….Stop the  Poofs from taking over the Australian Cricketing Landscape!

So get UP & ABOUT!

Dingo!

Is Isaac Luke A Dog..??

This is one hot topic in Rugby League Circles this week following the test between the Aussies & the Sheep Shaggers.

Kiwi Lunatic Isaac Luke is at the centre of another debate following his cannonball tackle on David Shillington.

I personally think that it is a dangerous tackle & could end someones career & it should be somehow outlawed.

I will leave it open to you. Is a cannonball tackle a dog act?? Or is it Rugby League? Or are we getting soft criticising a contact sport?

Movember and equality.

Well Movember is upon us once again and as you all know it represents the fight for mens health, particularly prostate cancer and depression. The grow your mo for a month has become a sport in its own right with competitions and bets happening all over the country to see who can cultivate the hairy upper lip.

During this memorable month we see a variety of mo’s on show. One notable mo that comes to mind is the ‘out of work porn star’ look that has been proudly adorned by a big unit currently playing for the cowboys. It’s a given that the sale of razor blades will drop during this period as bloke after bloke strive to get the best mo on show to win that $10 bet or  first prize, a case of beer. One very solid piece of advice though, stay away from the Freddy Mercury style, that is, if you don’t want to pinned in a back lane and slammed in the ring.
equality:
In this modern-day of equality, Movember excludes our female population and that’s just not fair (I mean we can’t ask women to grow a mo, the Greek and Lebanese chicks would smash it). So I’ve given this some thought and old Brown dog reckons the best way to involve our fairer sex is to give them a month of their own. Well sprayers, that month, logically, is Fanuary. That’s right, Fanuary. The month when women get to cut and style the old map of Tassie for our viewing pleasure. Imagine being out all night, downed a dozen schooners, eaten a kebab and then be confronted with a Charlie Chaplin, Tom Selleck, Clark Gable or general Custard. ooops, I mean Custer.

So, let’s get the word out there. Can we possibly get feed back ? A growing number of participants ? Possibly sponsorship from Schick or Wilkenson Sword? It stands to reason that after a lean Movember for these company’s sales will skyrocket in the glorious month of Fanuary. So let’s get cracking sprayers, do ya best.——–can on.

Tiger will claw back

I am cumming into bat for the mad rooter T. Woods. Eldrick may have dicked around recently but recovery from knee surgery and swing changes take time. Somebody with his record doesnt forget how to play and the old shagger is now 35. Floppy Phil, Ernie and Vijay arent exactly building new trophy cabinets either. One point i agree with is his air of invincibility has diminished. No one fears the Tiger anymore but rest assured Woods will be polishing trophies whilst his “trophies” polish his wood in no time.

The weekend wrap 30/10/11

  • Sam Stosur gets bundled out of the end of season tournament. Bloody Stosur! The woman gives Australian tennis hope of a rival and someone to pin Australia’s expectations on after winning the US open. But since then Slamin Sam has been treading in the same water as players that haven’t done what she’s done. By that I mean, she has been losing tournaments early and to players of less quality than her. Christ! Don’t give me another Pat Rafter!
  •  England beat Wales and Australia beat NZ in the Rugby league 4 nations tournament. I don’t know much about the 4 nations tournament, but since when was Wales in it? I thought the wine sipping frog eating poofters from France were the other nation.
  • Mr Cricket guides the Aussies to win their third one dayer against the South Africans. This bloke goes about his business without fuss, without tough stickers, without piercings, without youth and without fear. A man for all occasions, the Huss shows how its done!
  • Bennett will face the Dragons in the first NRL fixture next year. Who do you think would be more nervous, Peter Doust, Steve Price or Darius Boyd? I have my money on Steve Price. A shalacking of the Dragons at the hands of Tinkler and Bennett’s men will send a large shudder through Doust and Co.
  • Has anyone seen the hair-do former Aussie goal keeper Mark Bosnich is sporting? Donal Trump eat you heart out! The former “lines man” (sniff) has gone for a hair colour somewhere between metallic orange and brown. Actually come to think of it, it’s a cross between Silvo Belusconi’s mop, the Italian prime minister, and Donald Trumps own car wreck.  
  • Will Richie die this summer? I know this is a tough and somewhat morbid question, but the old bastard has been on camera forever. I actually think the public will witness  the old man kicking the bucket mid sentence. The question is, Who will replace him? That bloody clown Mark “smashing baby” Nicholas doesn’t deserve the 3rd highest post in the country. A, because he’s foreign and, B, because Kerry Packer wouldn’t approve of it. The big fella would give it to any ex Australian cricket captain, including Kim Hughes, before he’d give it to the ladies man from Hampshire.
  • Bloody Mark Webber again disappoints by finishing 4th at the inaugural Indian GP. Mark has caused no end of disappointment to this author this year. In apparently identical cars, Webber’s team-mate Sebastian Vettle has won nearly everything this year while Mark has spluttered at starts, crashed out of races and had terrible pit stops. F*#k Mark!
  • The Gerringong Jets have beaten arch rivals Kiama in an at times feisty contest on the weekend. Once again I’ll save you all the boring stuff, but credit has to go to Ben alphabet Chickncndisksalasdtbfjosky. The young lad pulled us out of the shit with a calm performance in personally difficult circumstances. Also, small mention must be made to one of the English imports, Tinno. Tinno gave good chat in the field and fielded well under the lid considering the dodgy bowling being offered by his pommy counterpart. No seriously, some mention must be made to Jimmy the cricket Hayman. The blond-haired albino scared the pants out of some of the Kiama batsman, particularly one B, Kingee. Blondy used Kingee’s head as a bullseye and aimed bounce after bouncer in one well-directed and fast over, which finished with Kingee walking off beaten and in serious need of new underware.

Kat a victim, not a whinger.

We all know about Simon Katich’s now infamous spit towards Cricket Australia after his unceremonious axing earlier this year. And we know the saga has reared its pointy head again as cheif axe wielder Hildich steps down as chairman of selectors and is replaced by John Inverarity. As far as I’m concered the Kat has every right to be pissed off at CA for the way they hit him for 6 and it’s therefore no surprise that matter has bounced up again.

The Kat says that Micheal all smiles Clarke was behind his contract being fed to the shredder. But It is my belief that Micheal Clarke was not directly involved in sending Simon packing, rather, it was a decision made by the selectors to make the transition of Clarke the puppy, tattooed bonds boy, to Clarke the National Cricket captain of Australia.

The selectors could not have another season where captaincy speculation and team harmony were food for the un-knowledgable and negative press hungry media galleries. To make the transition “softer”  for the Cafe` sipper, the selectors looked at the squad and said “which dickhead could make Clarke’s Captaincy tough”? A red line went under the Kat’s name.  Poor old Kat had his CA contract pulled out of the filing cabinet and moved to Hildich’s toilet roll holder.

So the fact is, I truly doubt that Latte` Clarke directly influenced Kat’s contract ending up at the bottom of sewerage pit. I think it was a nervous Cricket board that made the move in the hope Clarkey’s reign would start off on the foot and not be dogged by mutterings of team unrest and division. 

That all said, the Kat should not have been dumped. Instead, he should have been made an interim skipper between Ponting and Clarke. His hard nose  follows in the line of Steve Waugh and Allan Boarder, a nose that would have served some of the wet dicks in the team well. Instilling a bit of tough love and self belief in this lot could have laid a foundation for Clarke to build on. Instead, Clarke’s foundation is a slab built on poor leadership, dummy spitting and as Mr Eldridge quite eloquently put, moisturizers, blond tips, tattoos and yoga books. Don help us.

Will Tiger ever win again?

The 2nd full year without Tiger Woods winning a tournament is approaching. Not since the 2009 Australian Masters tournament has the formerly invincible Woods been able to register a single win. It only took a car crash, the result of his attempts to escape a club wielding wife, foaming at the mouth for his goolies to be cut off, that poor old Woods lost his mojo on the course and is now just another player with 14 clubs, a caddy and a fat wallet.

Before Woods’s indiscretions became public, the bed hopper was on the verge of becoming the first sports’ billionaire. He was raking in cash the likes of which none had done before. But that has all but come to a halt, as tournament wins dried up and sponsors abandon what must have seemed like a sinking ship. If only Earl Woods were around.

Woods’ old man is and was probably the only bloke who could have saved his son from falling outside the top 50 and bring him back to the top of world golf. But Woods Sr is unlikely to be of any assistance as he’s been pushing up daisies for some time now.

So it left to Woods to bring himself back to the top. However; this may prove difficult as Woods may not have given up his off course activities. An official single man now, Woods has been probably spreading his seed far wide in order to feel like he’s winning something, even if it is the hand of  a bar maid for one night who’s hell bent on seeking tips to improve her ball handling.

Without a notable win in the next year, it would seem unlikely that Woods will ever achieve Jack Nicklaus’s record of 18 majors. A feat that was seemingly going to be run down in the next few years or so before Woods was caught with his balls in the wrong bag.

Oh for better times

It wasn’t all that long ago that this time of year had 3 distinct smells. The first was of the Backyard BBQ being kicked in guts for the time since last summer. The second was a fresh can of areogaurd being cracked. And the third was fear. Fear ozzing from bulging sets of underpants worn by oppostion cricket sides ready to board a National carrier bound for down under.

In those days, say between 1999 and 2008, opposition cricket sides would come here certain of 1 thing, defeat. Bowlers would leave with batting averages and batsman would leave with bowling averages. It was elementy.

Winning the toss and batting first was a formality, as was watching Haydos, Langer, Gilly and co driving, cutting, pulling, gliding, sweeping and flicking their way to 400 by the end of the first day’s play.
Then we’d watch Pidge, Warne, Dizzy and Bing scittle wickets, smash egos and crush reputations. But not any more.

The poor old Aussies have come back down to the playing field and are just mear mortals again. We now watch our bowlers toil away for days and our batsman scratch, edge and dribble their way to scores. It’s just not the same.

I’m afraid the most dominate smell in the air come cricket season, is the greasy oil from the shapening stone as Hildich and co take turns wielding their favourite weapon, the axe.

Come back Warnie, Come back Gilly, bring back those better days.

Kat v Dog

So the Kat has literally been released from the Bag!!!!

Now being a K9 myself, the Dingo thinks that the only Kat is a dead kat…..

However in this particular case, I see this Kat as a Junkyard dog.

Everyone knows of the ‘Legend’ of him pinning the K9 that now some holds our nations highest honour. Now correct me if I’m wrong, that Dog ain’t no Labrador???

More like pissy little mut that wouldn’t look out of place in Paris Hilton handbag!

Any how the Kat has given the Dog a right old spray and deserving so!

I ask you punters, which would you have fighting beside ya in the trenches???

Latte drinking, tough stickers covered, hair highlighting Chihuahua Clarke,

or the bare knuckles fighting, not giving a inch Ally Kat Katich?

Presidents Cup beat up!

Finally Freddy Couples sets the Aussies straight!

Every Aussie golfer is putting the boot into Fred about his captains pick of Tiger Woods. Sure the bloke has been a little naughty, but worthy on non-selection??

Firstly Greg Norman says that Tigs will never win another Major and you know everyone else has a little dig cos its Tiger!

Why? He’s a threat that’s why! Otherwise we (I) wouldn’t be talking about it!

Any way I’m off the track here.

Freddy (the previous lady slaying champion) has a dig back at Norman on his captains pick of Allenby “I’ve picked Tiger and he has picked a guy who hasn’t won in ten years (PGA Tour)” .

BOOM!

Chris needs to stop being a Kat

One-time Australian opener Chris Rogers this week was the latest cricketer to accuse the selection panel of a lack of cuddling skills.

Rogers: may need a cuddle at the lunch interval.

He believes he was owed more than the customary ‘pop the champers’ selection phone call when he was brought into the team to temporarily replace Matt Hayden for the test match against India in 2008. It was a rapid entry-and-exit of which he was well aware, as Big Haydos was always expected to make a speedy recovery.
 
Rogers said he deserved another call after he wasn’t picked again, and that his impeccable domestic record warranted some regular love from the panel. As we all know, Chris finished with a test average of 9.5, we lost the test match and he nicked off back to plunder state attacks for a living, and Andrew never picked up the phone to talk to him again.

Its hardly in the Simon Katich category of gross mistreatment by an employer.

I know what you are thinking…. and no, I’m not here to stick up for the selection panel. They’ve caused enough havoc at all levels over recent years and I’m not about to start sending Andrew Hilditch greeting cards. My question is: whereabouts on the picking tree do you need to be to have every decision explained? Where do you draw the line? 

There has been truckloads of talent over the years who haven’t had the honour of a flirty text conversation with Andrew and his cronies. Surely not everyone can be kept up to date with where they sit in the big picture, can they? As we all know, Andrew has a law firm to run on top of his many priorities, which include picking teams to get swamped by the Poms, and killing the careers of our latest spin-bowling sensations.

Dizzy Gillespie

Dizzy: got the rough end of the pineapple.

Obviously Rogers’ time has passed, but this retrospective swipe doesn’t win him any fans. He did all he could by bellowing for attention via the language of runs. He should have left it at that.

So now we’ve established the rules, who do you think in our vast domestic scene has been used-and-abused over the years without getting a running commentary of Mr Hilditch’s thought patterns? Phil Jaques scored a hundred in his last test, did Andy pick up the blower and tell him that the 100 he scored simply wasn’t pretty enough? Was Scott Muller told via the line that it was because he ‘can’t bowl can’t throw’? Did Cricket Australia cause a social faux pas by doing the break-up with Dizzy with a sneaky text message after his double-ton?

 

I await your phone call.

 

 

 

 

The answer is Boof

Can I get a holla for that rotund Aussie icon Darren Lehmann?

Now I don’t want to push my luck after the blessing of Tim Neilsen’s sacking, but can we get a campaign going to get Boof in the coaches hot-seat for the Aussies? 

The dressing shed needs a top-to-tail flush of all the moisturisers, blonde-tips and yoga techniques that have sneaked in to the place over the years. What better way than with a huge otto-bin full of  West End Lager fresh from Boof’s beer fridge in Adelaide?

He’s the kind of figure that Aussie cricket needs. And we need a dead-set electro-shocking usually saved for those sucking in their last lungful of oxygen.

Who could forget the style of the man? A wily tactician who batted majestically, bowled cleverly, and who has been exposed to every match situation possible in the game. And a team-man to boot, who has spilled more sweat on the pitch and cold suds in the lockers than most.

Most of all, we need someone who is low on the bullshit. Boof is that man.

Unless anyone can tempt Warney out of retirement/Liz Hurley… he would be fricken’ awesome!

 

Still no electricity at Cronulla

What a shame that the folks down at Cronulla won’t be able to experience this fantastic new website.

At least I assume they won’t be able to…. after the events of the last couple of days, the only conclusion I can come to is that they live in the dark ages with no internet, television or print media. Are they not aware of the ale-powered beast that is Todd Carney and his extensive gallery of misdemeanours?

If you’ve lived anywhere on the eastern seaboard in the last 5 years, chances are you’ve seen him in the boozer 12 schooners deep the night before a game, or at least sighted his inked-up mug on the front page asking for another chance.

Once again, the powerbrokers down at the Shire have covered themselves in glory and truly proven that they don’t understand the concept of money. The fluffy figures floating up from God’s country for Toasted Toddy’s services are in the realms of $350,000 per year!  A far cry from his realistic current market value which should be around the ‘pie and coke’ range.

I can only assume that Cronulla enjoy self-harm. Are they comfortable having the reputation of being the ugly bird in the nightclub who is always on their own at the end of the night? They will simply jump into the sack with anybody who gives them attention. And in good time too.

And don’t get me started on David Gallop. He must be speaking latin when he utters the words ‘last chance’. Translated to english, this actually means ‘please Todd, rape the NRL brand again.’

Any predictions on when Carneys first chunder on the dancefloor at Carmens will occur?

Australia’s top 5 cricketers to wear the Baggy green

 Number 1: The Don – Who else would it be? Not only the best cricketer ever, but Australia’s best sportsman ever.

Number 2: Shane Warne – The Victorian wizard is Australia’s best spin bowler ever and possibly the best bowler ever. The blond-haired mad rooter has bedded approximately over 1000 women to go with his 708 test wickets and 293 one wickets. Not bad stats if you ask me.

 Number 3: Adam Gilchrist – Gilly, is not only revolutionised the role of the keeper in the team, he ended up becoming the greatest keeper batsman to have ever played the game. A stat that no one talks about is that to my knowledge Gilly never scored a test hundred at a strike rate less than 80. His overall test career strike rate is 82, easily the highest of any player who has scored more than 3000 runs. This bloke would could rightly claim a place on the list of top 5 cricketers to have ever played the game. 

 Number 4: Dennis Lillee – If Warnie is the best spinner we’ve produced, then this bloke is the best fast bowler. A bloke who possessed real pace early on, Lillee overcame back difficulties and age to still have a knack of taking wickets by the end of his career through smart swing and seam bowling. 

Number 5: Keith Miller – The Shane Warne of his day, old Keithy was a ladies man and a mans’ man. One of those blokes who possessed oodles of talent, this mad shagger from yesteryear stands as Australia’s greatest batting and bowling all-rounder. His stats as a bowler are outstanding and his batting was as impressive as it was powerful. A true legend.

Who are your top 5?

Carney Swimming with Sharks

So its official, Todd Carney is now a Sharkie!! Welcome to the shire Toddy, hopefully you won’t get kicked out of it like you got kicked out of the township of Goulburn. Will this end bad for the Sharkies? I think it will. I’m sorry but the kid has such a serious problem with alcohol and the sooner the better he, the NRL and all the guys on the footy show can admitt this the sooner he can get some professional help and get on with his footy career. The heart breaking thing is he is such an unpredictable and natural talent with great skills to be one of the best but the drink prevents this from ever happening. I hope it works out for the best but I just can see heart break for Todd as a person, heart break for his family, heart break for David Gallop and the NRL and especially heart breat for the Shire and their loyal fans. With Alcohol and Betting being the two major sponsors for the sport, its not hard to see now one can get caught up with the two passtimes associated with the NRL just like a Todd Carney. As a Rooster supporter I was glad to see the back of Carney when he was in trouble but warmly welcomed and prasied him when he was playing fantastic footy and we were winning. Alcoholics have to realise they can not just have one or two drinks with the boys after a game as their lack self control and let their addiction brain take over. They can not drink at ALL. This is an impossible predicament for Todd, with the today’s NRL/Sport culture. The Raiders tried and failed, as the Roosters and will the Sharks be another casaulty of the Todd Carney Train wrecking machine. Whatever happens its sure to sell papers and keep a few jounralists in a job for the time being.

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Evers News

Old Brown dogs take.

Great to see a site where the better than average armchair critic can cut loose and let the educated sporting public of the world know what is on my mind. The rugby world cup is a true world showpiece in sport. If the IRB want this to remain a show piece , changes have to be made. First, tweak the rules a little to create more open running football. We want to see end to end ball movement. Some tries would be good as well. The points allocated fir penalty goals and field goals has to be revised. I’m over seeing teams win on penalties and usually this occurs due to the pandantic whistle blower. You didn’t roll away he says as he blows his whistle and awards a penalty. Wtf. Please tell me who can roll away with 500 kilo laying on them. Common sense please. Now I’ve work up a suitable sweat, can on.

Best coach in the game? Please!

Do you what really grinds my gears? It’s when I read from knuckle heads in the media that Des Hasler has better record over Wayne Bennett over the last 5 years and that makes him a better coach. What utter tosh! Those knuckle heads in the media to which I am referring to roll out irrelevant stats like Desie holding more premierships and grand final appearances  than Bennett for that same period of time. Like anyone in sport or life, consistency over long periods is the true measure of greatness. I’ll throw a few stats that those idiots never bothered to mention when talking up Desie’s record. How about the Brisbane Broncos winning back to back in 92,93 – the last side to do so – and then winning in 98 and 2000, not to mention the Brisbane win in ’06 and the St George win in 2010. Who was the coach? Bennett, you wankers! By my calculations, Bennett has achieved Deeessssiee’s feat of 2 premierships in 5 years 3 or 4 times, depending on how you look at it. The Queensland mute has also only missed 3 finals series in all his time as a coach, ’88, ’89, ’91. How’s that for consistency!

Haka fines Frogs

So the sliver medalist from the 2011 New Zealand Rugby World Cup, the French Rugby Union Team has been fined $15,000 for advancing for linking arms and advancing on the All Blacks before Rugby World Cup final haka. My original thoughts was that it was extremely disrespectful towards New Zealand culture by  advancing towards New Zealands traditional tribal war dance. But now that the Frogs have been finanically hit in the pcoket, my thoughts have changed. The International Rugby Board (IRB) rule is that no other team may venture from the 10 metre line from their own half towards the All Blacks while they are completing the haka. This is not the first time the French have done something like this, as in the 2007 rugby world cup quarter final again, against the All Blacks they advanced towards the haka then and escaping a reprimand, but it was not as extreme as on the 23rd Sunday night Ocyober 2011.

I heard Peter FitzSimons  on the news tonight and he begged the question as an opposition team member; Are you suppose to just stand there and take the All Blacks imitating throat cutting actions, punching fists and violent actions towards you when they are dancing the haka? You have 26 full grown men beardy acting violently out how you are going to spend your last minutes on this earth, before they bury you into the turf of Eden Park as your funeral. What is a man to do?!!!! Just stand there and watch how you are going to perish!!! I don’t think so. To just surrender and die!!!! Especially by a Kiwi!!!!

The Haka no doubtly is a psychological advantage being Kiwi and doing the haka before such a physical contest just ask any psychiatrist. However, war is very different to playing professional rugby but they liken football to war. Im not so sure. 

Obviously, the Australian Rugby Legue (ARL) have a different rule when it comes to the haka as from the World Cup  final a couple of years ago, the mighty Kangaroo’s advanced right up in the faces of the Kiwi players whilst they were doing the haka and the Kangaroo’s lost the game. The French Rugby coach thought it was unfair, as did the Kiwi manager and so many rugby fans would universally all agree.

The French  advancing on the haka was probably not poltically or culturally correct however fining them is a probably not the right consquence as they had already lost the final. It just adds a bit of flair and more emotion to the centre stage of the rugby world cup. If this action has caused raised eyebrows, bring on the 2015 RWC the sooner ther better. Maybe the French should start a frog dance to intimidate the Kiwis next time they meet!!!

Rules killing the Game

The rules of rugby are killing the future and enjoyment of the game. They call the game of rugby, the game they play in heaven. God only know if Jesus’ plays the game and how well the Jersuselum XVI would go in the super 15, I don’t think real well!!!!
With the rule book the size of an entire national library, there’s no wonder that anyone knows what the penalty is for. Sometimes even the ref ponders to himself why he blew the whistle himself unless he likes the sound of his own whistle and was bullied at school and is now taking authority from his position. Frustration is experienced also by the commentators, the extreme fans in the crowd and the dad’s watching the rugby from their lounge rooms who all of a sudden become professional rugby experts and teach their sons how to “really play”. There are just way too many rules which spoils what could be exciting flowing and fast running rugby. People prefer to watch any footy code that is exciting with points usually tries. I play the game and often wonder how you can train a team to be perfect in every facuets of the rule book. I feel it is impossible. It’s like a business conforming with every OH&S law without going bankrupt.

Another point I’d like to make is that I personally feel rugby league kicks are far better than rugby union kickers. With the points being more in rah rah, one would feel that the kickers ability should be the other way around, leaving their NRL counterparts. Time and time again I watch the likes of Johnanthan Thruston and Hazem El Masri pop them over the black dot from the sideline like their blind folder. With ex wallabies coaching staff teaching current wallabies how to kicking it makes you wonder what they do at training. I previously went to a Brumbies Tahs game where all the points where scored by the boot. I sat there wondering is this what I really wanted from my purchased ticket so I went and brought another overpriced beer and drowned my sorrows.

So what is there for the future if rugby, you ask hopefully an international body that sells a general, fair and most important fewer rule book and less authoritial blowing their whistles, a change in the point system, less ping pong kicking and a running rugby as a player once said to me you can’t win the game if you kick the ball away!!!

Warming the Pine

Sport for those with comfortable couches.